Youth Voice Writing Contest 2021 — First Place, Poetry
Been hustling since I was a kid
Selling candy door to door
Built off commission & them tips
Cause momma couldn’t give me more
She worried ’bout raising six kids all alone
Trinidad immigrant, she had to get it on her own
2010 drugs & poverty made my momma fold
I had to step up to the plate just to keep from digging a deeper hole
& I was 11 years old when they placed me in the system
One incident that’s not my fault and my caseworker mess up how I’m living
And they thinking I’m different cause I’m reserved
Nah, I’m distant cause they didn’t want me to be heard
14 years old and I’m placed back with my momma
She was so far gone my caseworker started asking for my father
21 year old me looking back like damn, that was some trauma
Had to put my life on pause for a sec but no use of a comma
15 to 16 high school mobility
I changed schools so quick nobody was a friend to me
And my family, f it, some of them is dead to me
No one was checking on me
Not one phone call in the system, man, that was really messing with me
Like why Lord, why I gotta be the black sheep
Why my mom care more about them got damn percs more than me
Why my daddy always locked up & on drugs acting blind to my pain like he can’t see
Why my siblings fall back like I’m the enemy?
So I found myself homeless at age 16
But my counselor told me I could graduate early & I thought I was daydreaming
I asked myself what college gon’ do with a girl like me
Black, poor, with a lack of family support
& what about my low ACT score
I thought these were the traits that would diminish me
Summer 2017 I was 17 so I had to make a plan
Like how I start college courses before my senior year in high school ever began
But I was hustling collecting scholarships & Micky D money
Full-time college student & was awarded work study
Had to work two jobs just to get outta foster care in a hurry
I swear I was starting my independent process a little early
So when the time came for me to be age 18
My foster mom put out a 30-day notice for me to leave
Yeah she was mistaken cause I was already escaping
F being complacent
I had my first apartment lined up within a matter of weeks
From 19 to 20 I was coming up in the metro community
Had a 3.5 GPA cause this school stuff wasn’t new to me
Soon as I put myself first I was blessed with opportunities
I was in the prime of my college career & couldn’t wait to see what I was soon to be
Like damn, how was I awarded over 50 grand in scholarships
How I got the president of the university telling me that she proud of me
I had to go hard just for the people who doubted me
But I had to go just as hard for the people who was looking out for me
& how I even end up on two committees
I didn’t even know social justice would fit me
I found the EPIC scholars program & found people who get me
Independent, first-generation, college students, who uplift me
Mental health, financial wealth, we push the boundaries even when they’re restricting
& my first time parents breaking generational curses cause shifting habits makes a difference
& some of us done encountered the criminal justice system
Substance use to homelessness but we still remain persistent
You ever had to juggle taken care of ya family, in the middle of a pandemic, and there still wasn’t no quitting
Yeah I know a couple of y’all could feel it
Immigration disability but we still revealing resiliency
Jumped over every hurdle just to be 21 with a master’s degree
Went for my master’s ’cause its just some extra cash for me
Promised myself poverty would never be a trap for me
So don’t ask me how I made it because I’ve been in survival mode
If one more thing threaten my future it’s gon’ be the final blow
I work too hard so I stay solo on this silent road
I’m the backbone to my success so you know I play a vital role
This only the beginning to a new chapter but I swear it’s not the final show
Peace